Jeremy Corbyn Reveals Dossier ‘Proving Christmas Up For Sale’
Jeremy Corbyn revealed he has obtained official documents that show Christmas will be up for sale in a Conservative post-Brexit trade deal.
US
Barack Obama Sends Hosni Mubarak Angry, All Caps Email
US President Barack Obama has reportedly sent an impassioned, all caps email to Hosni Mubarak requesting his ‘IMMEDIATE’ departure from power.
Republican Candidate Releases Sex Tape, Proves Not Gay
Carl Paladino has released a ‘short but graphic’ sex tape to prove to voters that he is definitely not gay.
Clinton: ‘Britain Vulnerable To Godzilla Attack’
Hilary Clinton delivered a stark warning against major cuts in the British defence budget, which could leave them open to attack from Godzilla, Cthulhu or similar monsters.
Visa Announces Races Card
Visa have today unveiled the new Race Card, a credit card with a 0% balance transfer and ability to maximise situations were personal responsibility can be circumvented with the mention of race.
Wu Tang Clan Make Job Cuts As Unemployment Rises
After years of explosive growth, the Wu Tang Clan have been forced into an unexpected round of job cuts, pushing their unemployment rate past 20%.
Children Protest As Ahmadinejad Claims There Is No Santa
A group of second graders and their parents have staged an angered walk out after Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad made stunning claims that ‘Santa Claus was not real’
BP Call End To Flow of Negative Media Reporting On Gulf
BP officials have formally declared an end to the outpouring of negative press after the Deepwater Horizon rig blew up on 20 April.
Muslim Radicals To Christian Radicals: That’s Our Thing
Extremist Muslim radicals have branded extremist Christian radicals as ‘copy cats’ after a church revealed plans to burn the Koran on the anniversary of 9/11.
Lil Wayne To Release New Mixtape ‘I Don’t Wanna Talk About It’
Lil Wayne has not allowed an eight month prison sentence to interrupt a successful career and is set to release his new mixtape titled “I Don’t Wanna Talk About It”.