Donald Trump To Start Trade War Over Foreign Vibranium
UNITED STATES – In a major escalation of his aggressive trade rhetoric, Donald Trump has announced he plans to impose punishing tariffs on all imported vibranium.
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Medical Scientists Mystified By Spineless Paul Ryan
Scientists in America’s top medical institutes have reported being collectively mystified by Paul Ryan’s ability to walk without a spine.
Donald Trump To Build Wall Around North Pole
Donald Trump has announced a controversial plan to build a wall around the North Pole in order to keep “the wrong kind of presents from entering America.”
Nick Clegg Calls For 2015 Election Debate To Be Held In 2010
Nick Clegg has called for next month’s General Election debate to be rescheduled April 2010, when he had a chance of being Prime Minister.
Republicans Accuse Obama Of Using Presidential Powers To Run Country
The nation’s most prominent Republicans have hit out at Barack Obama after he threatened to use his powers as President to run the country.
Google Confirm “Yes, Our Robots Will Eventually Destroy Humanity”
After its purchase of a military grade robotics company, Google have confirmed that yes, they are trying to start a robot apocalypse that will kill us all.
Republicans Unveil Google.com As Obamacare Alternative
Congressional House Republicans have unveiled their first genuine alternative to the Affordable Care Act: google.com.
Americans Avoid Fiscal Cliff By Throwing Congress Over Actual Cliff
In an unexpected resolution, Americans have agreed an 11th hour deal to solve the country’s economic problems by pushing members of congress over an actual cliff.
Physical Manifestation of Rush Limbaugh’s Blind Rage Early 2016 Frontrunner
After Barack Obama’s re-election, a physical manifestation of Rush Limbaugh’s blind rage is being tipped to become GOP candidate for president in 2016.
Mitt Romney Crushed By Magic 8-Ball in Debate Warm Up
Mitt Romney has suffered a major setback ahead of the presidential debates after a crushing defeat to Magic 8-Ball forced him to call short a warm up debate session.