9/11 Anniversary: Bin Laden Dead, But Charlie Sheen Still Out There
Barack Obama has warned the American people to stay vigilant, reminding the nation that although Osama Bin Laden may be dead “Charlie Sheen is still out there.”
osama bin laden
“Al-Qaeda May Be Plotting To Fund Future Series of The Kardashians,” Warn FBI
The FBI have warned al-Qaeda may be preparing renewed attacks on the United States, possibly by funding future seasons of Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
SEAL Team 6 Successfully Pick Up Obama Daughters From School
SEAL Team 6 have rescued the president’s daughters from school in the kind of daring raid the Obama administration said “ensures the girls are home in time for dinner”.
White House Names Armed Predator Drone As Person of the Year
The White House has selected its person of the year, giving the distinction to the individual they feel has had the most impact throughout the year: The predator drone.
“Al-Qaeda Planning 9/11 Anniversary Dinner” Says Homeland Security
US security officials have leaned that al-Qaeda are planning an ‘ambitious’ dinner ahead of the anniversary of the September 11th attacks.
US Punishes ‘Naughty’ Pakistan, Cuts off Allowance Money
The United States confirmed it has cut off Pakistan’s $800 million allowance ‘right this minute’ warning that it would also be grounded for up to a month.
New al-Qaeda Leader Starts Small, Stages Attack On US Mailbox
New al-Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zawahiri has reportedly claimed responsibility for a ‘devastating’ attack on a US mailbox.
KFC Double Down Becomes New al-Qaeda Leader
After weeks of speculation, a number of sources are confirming the appointment of the KFC Double Down as the new leader of al-Qaeda.
Winklevoss Twins Sue White House Over “Our Idea To Kill Bin Laden”
Cameron and Tyler Winklevoss are set to launch legal proceedings against Barack Obama, accusing him of stealing their idea to kill Osama Bin Laden.
Donald Trump Demands Bin Laden’s Death Certificate
Donald Trump has launched an unexpected attack on Osama Bin Laden, demanding he release his long form death certificate to prove he is really dead