Donald Trump Announces Resignation of Santa Claus
NORTH POLE – In the latest sudden resignation during the Trump administration, Santa Claus has confirmed he will resign his post this Christmas.
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Medical Scientists Mystified By Spineless Paul Ryan
Scientists in America’s top medical institutes have reported being collectively mystified by Paul Ryan’s ability to walk without a spine.
Republicans Accuse Obama Of Using Presidential Powers To Run Country
The nation’s most prominent Republicans have hit out at Barack Obama after he threatened to use his powers as President to run the country.
Republicans Unveil Google.com As Obamacare Alternative
Congressional House Republicans have unveiled their first genuine alternative to the Affordable Care Act: google.com.
US Denies Barack Obama Knew NSA Had Tapped Prayers To God
The National Security Agency is denying reports that Barack Obama has been aware of the surveillance of prayers to God since 2010.
Americans Avoid Fiscal Cliff By Throwing Congress Over Actual Cliff
In an unexpected resolution, Americans have agreed an 11th hour deal to solve the country’s economic problems by pushing members of congress over an actual cliff.
Gang Leaders Accused of Racial Profiling Potential Applicants
A damning new study has revealed Caucasians applicants to be “woefully under-represented” within gangs across poor cities, with nearly three quarters of top gang roles held by black men.
Barack Obama Agrees Deal To Hand His Balls To Republicans
President Barack Obama says he has finally reached an agreement on the debt ceiling which will see Republican congressmen take full possession of his balls.
Sesame Street Cast To Explain Government To Washington
The makers of hit show Sesame Street have invited members of congress to a special taping of the show designed to teach them how governments should work.
Barack Obama Speech Fails To Address Nolan Snub
Barack Obama’s State of the Union address has been slammed for failing to address the biggest issue facing the country – Christopher Nolan’s snub for Best Director Oscar nomination.