Escaped Snake Returns To Natural Wall Street Habitat
A deadly snake thought to be loose in the city after escaping from the Bronx Zoo has been found miles away in it’s natural habitat: Wall Street.
World News
Sarah Palin Visits Zoo To Boost Foreign Experience
Following recent visits to India and Israel, Sarah Palin has ended her world tour with a trip to San Diego Zoo in a last ditch effort to gain foreign policy experience.
Banker Pees on Homeless Man, Explains Trickle Down Theory
A Wall Street banker has successfully communicated the fundamentals of Trickle down economics after taking a leak on a homeless man outside his office building.
Iran Threaten To Not Make Up The Numbers At Olympics
Iran have reiterated their threat to boycott the London 2012 Olympic Games, potentially leaving the IOC with one less country to make up the numbers at the event.
Hungry Protesters Demand End To Burger King’s Reign
The 40-year rule of the Burger King is believed to be under ‘serious’ threat amid increasing unrest throughout the fast food chain’s restaurants ad drive-thru locations.
UN Security Council Criticises Sun’s Nuclear Program
The UN is ‘considering all available options’ after the Sun unleashed a powerful solar flare last week, casting serious doubt over its nuclear program.
David Cameron’s Big Society Speech Nominated for Oscar
In a last minute Oscars shock, UK Prime Minister David Cameron has been added to the nominations for best male performance for his role in the defence of ‘The Big Society’
Ricky Hatton Unifies KFC, Popeyes Family Meals
Ricky Hatton rolled back the years last night when he successfully unified a bucket of KFC with a Popeyes Chicken and Biscuits family meal.
Super Bowl Showed Way Too Much Football, Say Advertising Fans
An independent survey has shown that 71% of Sunday’s television audience believe the Superbowl was completely ruined by the ‘bits in between the great commercials’
Angered Smurfs Launch Anti-Government Demonstrations
Tens of thousands of smurfs have gathered for a further day of enraged protests, calling for the ousting of the current smurf leadership.