Ronald McDonald To Run For California Governor
Ronald McDonald has announced his shock entry into the 2010 California gubernatorial elections in an astonishing bid to become California’s next Governor.
USA
Arizona Blasts Taco Bell Expansion Plans
Arizona officials have condemned proposed plans for the construction of a 4,200 square foot, single storey Taco Bell ‘just down the street’ from a Popeyes Chicken and Biscuits restaurant
Republicans Propose New Site For Mosque In Guantanamo Bay
In an effort to repair ties with the Muslim community, Republican politicians have offered Guantanamo Bay as an alternative site for the proposed Islamic centre and Mosque.
Iran To Extend Nuclear Family Programme
Iran has announced it will step up it’s plan to build more nuclear families across the country in defiance of western leaders demands for it to scale back it’s ‘agressive’ nuclear ambition.
Ground Zero Food Cart Plans Spark Anti-Falafel Backlash
Angry Republicans have blasted plans by Muslim street vendors to increase the number of falafel carts to compete with hot dog, burger and ‘other meat’ carts in the area.
Al Qaeda To Use Junk Food In Effort To Kill More Americans
Al Qaeda have admitted they can no longer compete with fast food restaurants when it comes to killing Americans and will halt current terrorist activities to open their own burger chain.
Lil Wayne To Release New Mixtape ‘I Don’t Wanna Talk About It’
Lil Wayne has not allowed an eight month prison sentence to interrupt a successful career and is set to release his new mixtape titled “I Don’t Wanna Talk About It”.
Gang Members Condemn Justin Bieber Wikileaks Report
Anonymous South Central LA gangs have condemned the leak which revealed profiles of members who recently viewed and voted for Justin Bieber’s ‘Baby’ video on YouTube.
Lemonade Stand Surpasses Local Newspaper Revenues
In distressing news for the print news industry, a lemonade stand today exceeded revenues of the local town’s newspaper for the first six months of 2010.
Mel Gibson Racial Slur Leak Cap Continues to Hold
PR experts have finally managed to stop the flow of obscenities, spite and racial outbursts flowing from the leak in Mel Gibson’s mouth using an innovative new cap system.