“Actually, We Would Like To Continue Making Obama Miserable,” Say GOP
The Republican Party have announced their exit from the race for president to concentrate on making President Obama’s life miserable for another four years.
USA
China Scolds US For Bringing Home ‘Shameful’ Grades
China has launched an astonishing attack on the United States after it received ‘shameful’ grades in it’s latest credit rating report card.
Barack Obama Agrees Deal To Hand His Balls To Republicans
President Barack Obama says he has finally reached an agreement on the debt ceiling which will see Republican congressmen take full possession of his balls.
Sesame Street Cast To Explain Government To Washington
The makers of hit show Sesame Street have invited members of congress to a special taping of the show designed to teach them how governments should work.
Norway Gunman “Giving Us Racists A Bad Name” Say KKK
The Klu Klux Klan have joined a growing number of hate groups to distance themselves from Anders Behring Breivik after fears he would give honest racists a bad name.
Barack Obama Launches Kickstarter Project To Service National Debt
United States President Barack Obama has signed up to Kickstarter in an unprecedented attempt to raise enough capital for the country to service it’s debt.
Satan Resigns From News Corporation
As the scandal surrounding News Corporation continues, fresh reports have emerged confirming Satan to be the latest executive to announce his resignation from the company.
Mafia Boss Shuts Down Local Operation After Reports of Corruption
Mafia boss John Gambino has today ordered the closure of the Gambino family after reports highlighted the inappropriate conduct of key members of the organisation.
Republicans Propose Bill To Repeal Candy From Babies
House Republicans are set to press forward with legislation that would see candy repealed from millions of babies across the United States.
New al-Qaeda Leader Starts Small, Stages Attack On US Mailbox
New al-Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zawahiri has reportedly claimed responsibility for a ‘devastating’ attack on a US mailbox.