Britain To Seek Post-Brexit Trade Deal With Wakanda
Trade Secretary Liam Fox has said Britain is eager to leave the EU Customs Union in order to trade freely with the nation of Wakanda post Brexit.
Africa
Donald Trump To Start Trade War Over Foreign Vibranium
UNITED STATES – In a major escalation of his aggressive trade rhetoric, Donald Trump has announced he plans to impose punishing tariffs on all imported vibranium.
Arsene Wenger: “Mugabe Should Have Got More Time”
EMIRATES, LONDON – Arsenal Manager Arsene Wenger is reported to be “very surprised indeed” to see Robert Mugabe willingly resign from his role as dictator.
Npower To Honour Nelson Mandela By Increasing Prices Another 2.7%
Energy supplier Npower has announced it will raise its energy prices a further 2.7% to mark the memory of Nelson Mandela’s time in prison.
A Response Letter From Joseph Kony
The following letter to internet users was delivered today on behalf of Joseph Kony.
Internet Users Frustrated Joseph Kony Still Free After Week of Tweeting
Following an entire week of tweeting, internet users have reportedly become frustrated that Joseph Kony has not been captured, branding the situation as “lame”.
Nigerian President Sends Email Request For Financial Aid
The following is a leaked message from the office of Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan sent to western leaders following his declaration of a state of emergency.
Ohio Officials Thank Libyan Rebels For Putting Down Libyan Mad Dog
An Ohio sheriff said has issued his “sincerest thanks” to Libya’s National Transitional Council for putting down the last of the wild animals to escape from a private zoo.
Gaddafi Audio Message: “I’m Still Mayor On Foursquare”
Libya’s former leader Mouammar Gaddafi has released a defiant audio message warning rebel forces that he is still Mayor of Tripoli on Foursquare.
Ashton Kutcher ‘To Replace Colonel Gaddafi In Libya’
Multiple reports out of Tripoli have indicated that former Punk’d star Ashton Kutcher is in ‘late stage’ talks to replace Colonel Gaddafi as leader of Libya.