ENGLAND – Thousands of investment bankers are being made to pay for their employees to be fitted with microchips under new economic safety plans.
Set to be unveiled next week, every manager at global investment banks will be required to fit new hires with a device giving details of who they belong to, trades made and their estimated bonus payout for the following financial year.
The chips, which sit under the banker’s skin, will make it easier to trace the owners of disproportionately leveraged financial trades say government sources.
Irresponsible owners
The initiative comes after the government has been accused of failing to crack down on attacks by dangerous financial traders.
Adair Turner, chairman of the Financial Services Authority chief first called for a strengthening of the dangerous bankers act after a vicious mauling left the international financial system on life support.
A spokesman for the Treasury Committee said: “while we have to be careful not to make things difficult for legitimate traders,” it was crucial “we find those bankers bred to make unnecessarily risky trades by executives with no moral scruples.”
He added that “if bankers had been kept on a tight leash at all times maybe we wouldn’t have needed to come to this.”
Some of the country’s biggest banks have already rallied against the move saying the estimated £100,000 cost to have employee chipped could have been spent on a bottle of Dom Perignon instead.
New measures
Recently, several investors have ben rushed to their mutual fund managers after their pensions were mauled by a “rogue traders”.
“I remembered it like it was yesterday,” said Claire Shawcroft, 52, who admitted that while her pension was showing signs of recovery, she had still not recovered from the emotional scarring of seeing it reduced to a third of ts original value.
Although Mrs Shawcroft did question whether microchipping bankers would actually prevent them from using other people’s money to gamble on international markets for personal gain, she agreed the decision was a step in the right direction.
“We’ve already seen what these animals can do when they’re let loose with little or no regulation – this is a no brainer.”
“It will be nice to find out which ones keep pooping in the park too.”
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