ZANESVILLE – An Ohio sheriff said has issued his “sincerest thanks” to Libya’s National Transitional Council for putting down the last of the wild animals to escape from a private zoo.
The Libyan mad dog (canis lupis rabiosi) is a non-domesticated form of canine native to the North African country and notorious for irrational violence, unintelligible communication patterns and a distinctive jheri curl-like coat.
Libyan officials described the escaped wild animals as “extremely dangerous”, advising residents to stay indoors “or call your nearest NATO representative” if spotted.
Finally got them all
Speaking at a press conference, Sheriff Matt Lutz confirmed “we have now accounted for all animals to escape the zoo during the week,” before thanking the rebels for assisting with the unfortunate termination of all animals released.
Libyan rebel chief Mahmoud Jibril promised to return the body to Ohio state in the morning for proper disposal – It is still not known how one of the escaped animals managed to travel as far as North Africa.
Despite praise from the sheriff’s department, the rebels have come under harsh criticism from animal rights group PETA, who slammed them for not making greater efforts to bring the escaped animal alive.
“We understand these animals are wild and dangerous,” said a spokesperson. “The mad dog is especially troublesome and a public danger, but we just believe the rebels could have made greater strides to subdue it by non-lethal means like tranquilizers or UN sanction.”
‘Had to end this way’
US nature host Jack Hanna said the death was especially tragic as it was the only one left in the wild, but did agree rebel forces “probably did the right thing.”
“Of course it’s always best to see dangerous animals returned safely to the facility. But once it goes this long without capture, the animal can become feral and there’s usually really only one way these things end.”
He later added: “Dems the breaks.”
The shooting brings the final death toll to 18 Bengal tigers, 20 lions, 1 wolf, 6 black bears, 2 grizzly bears, 1 baboon and 1 mad dog.
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