NEW JERSEY – In a move to protect its brand image, manufacturing conglomerate Acme Corp has offered to pay avid road runner chaser Wile E Coyote not to use its products.
Famous for pioneering the advancement of dynamite attached contraptions, Acme singled out Mr Coyote – aka famishius vulgaris ingeniusi – as particularly detrimental to its public perception.
Warner Bros confirmed it had received a “substantial payment” to encourage Wile E Coyote to use another brand of rocket propelled skates.
‘He’s making us look bad’
The self-proclaimed genius is a long time patron of the brand leader in jet propelled unicycles and is often seen using the company’s products in his show.
With so many humiliating failures linked to the use of Acme products, executives are said to be concerned that “our customers might get the impression our stuff tends not to work.”
“We are deeply concerned that Mr Coyote’s association with our brand is causing significant damage to its image,” the company said in a statement.
Despite the well documented cases of operational failure, Acme maintained “our products are at least as good as any other US manufacturing company.”
Wile E Coyote has so far remained silent on the issue, but is expected to hold up a sign detailing his reaction to the news later in the week.
A spokesman confirmed Mr Coyote’s intention was to fight the move unless he could find another reliable supplier of boomerangs with dynamite stuck to them and bird seed.
Damage control
Marketing experts agree the move by Acme was long overdue.
Karen Murphy, a marketing firm executive, said: “He claims to be a genius but still hasn’t caught the road runner and that calls his credibility into question, and by extension, the brands he associates with.”
She added that “every time he takes a thousand foot drop into that canyon it’s another cut to the heart of Acme brand value. This is an understandable move.”
Marketing consultant Andrew Barton was surprised it had taken this long as “in this day of social media you can’t afford to be known for selling bad products.”
“Wile E Coyote is in danger of making Acme synonymous with ‘badly manufactured remote control flying explosives’, and that’s a label no-one wants.”
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