NEWCASTLE – A local alcoholic has been recognised by Queen Elizabeth II with an MBE in the New Year Honours list for his selfless dedication in the field of being really really drunk all the time.
Carl Stevenson has battled a crippling alcohol addiction for over a decade and was singled out for “taking alcohol consumption to new and never before seen heights in 2010 by not only alienating oneself from family and other loved ones as a direct result of ones addiction, but by going out of ones way to make ones problems the problem of society too.”
During the past 12 months, the 43 year old divorcee was described as having a ‘rare and exemplary’ year that saw him miss over 90% of support group meetings, failing to provide adequate support for his children, turning up to work ‘heavily inebriated’, being arrested for drunk and disorderly behaviour on a record 17 occasions – all culminating in an October peak of being admitted to The Royal Victoria Infirmary hospital to receive treatment for acute liver damage.
Standout candidate
“This isn’t a surprise for those that know him,” said one neighbour. “I’ve seen plenty of alcoholics before, but Carl is head and shoulders above the rest. He really is. He never goes anywhere without a can of something strong in his hand and his face is always bright red so he must spend hours practising his craft.”
This year’s honours have been slammed as meaningless by some for being awarded to people doing only what is expected of them. However, these claims were rubbished by ex-wife Lucy Robinson who believed the MBE given to her former husband was well deserved.
“It’s easy to judge form the outside. There’s a reason I took the kids and left Carl. He not just an alcoholic, he’s the best. He did things that were just above and beyond the call of duty for anyone addicted to drink.”
Remarkable year
Mrs Robinson’s new partner also backed the award, saying that honours weren’t just about famous people, but to recognise the ordinary individuals applying their trade to an exceptional standard “day in and day out whether the cameras are there or not…and I hope Carl gets the help he needs someday.”
Carl Stevenson could not be reached for comment as he was currently ‘off his face’, but neighbours were confident the honour would be greatly appreciated once he sobered up for a few minutes.
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