Angered Smurfs Launch Anti-Government Demonstrations

SMURF VILLAGE – Tens of thousands of smurfs have gathered for a further day of enraged protests, calling for the ousting of the current smurf leadership.

In what has been described as an uprising of ‘unprecedented scale and blueness’, smurfs of all shapes and sizes, but identical fashion sense are angrily skipping with the single-minded aim of bringing down Papa Smurf’s autocratic regime.

Shouts of “down down Papa Smurf” can be heard from all corners; a cry against a leadership that has brought record Smurf unemployment and a severe shortage of smurfberries.

Full details have been slow to come out as it has proved extremely difficult for reporters to find the smurf village except when led by a smurf.

Rise of the oppressed smurf

With passions at a peak, many smurfs are now saying ‘smurf it’ and joining in rallies across smurf village. There are now very real fears the scenes could be repeated in other borderline dictatorial 20th century habitations, such as neighbouring Fraggle Rock.

“We’ve had it with this smurfing leadership,” raged Hefty Smurf before hurling a trashcan from the roof of his mushroom home. “We’re going to riot and we’re going to smurf all smurfing day and all smurfing night until Papa Smurf gets his big head out of his smurfing ass!”

“Change is coming,” promised Smurfette when she addressed the crowds, who believe Papa Smurf – ruler for over five decades – must now make way for democracy to flourish in the village.

“It’s smurfing chaotic out right now. This is unlike anything I’ve seen,” remarked Professor John Caulding, expert in smurf geopolitics. “This is even bigger than the smurf race riots of ’68. We are looking at a nation that is well and truly on the brink of smurf.”

‘We’re not smurfing around’

Tellingly, the smurf leader has given a televised address indicating that he had no plans to remove himself from power. Having already declared a village curfew, Papa Smurf promised a ‘severe smurfing’ for those that continued to participate in acts of civil disobedience.

“You must be out of your smurfing minds if you think I’m going anywhere” — just one sound bite from the expletive laden tirade which looks to only further escalated tensions between ordinary smurfs and Papa Smurf who vowed to remain in charge “for as long as there is smurf in my bones.”

In a historic battle for the very nature of smurf, neither side looks likely to back down.