“I Always Meant Microwave Oven Ready Brexit Deal” Says Johnson
LONDON, UK – British Prime Minister Boris Johnson has reminded the nation that the “oven ready” Brexit trade deal he promised was always meant to be a microwave oven ready […]
Jeremy Corbyn Reveals Dossier ‘Proving Christmas Up For Sale’
Jeremy Corbyn revealed he has obtained official documents that show Christmas will be up for sale in a Conservative post-Brexit trade deal.
Donald Trump Announces Resignation of Santa Claus
NORTH POLE – In the latest sudden resignation during the Trump administration, Santa Claus has confirmed he will resign his post this Christmas.
Kanye West Scares Millions Into Reading Books
Millions of people say they have been scared into reading books to avoid being caught looking as ignorant and uninformed as Kanye West.
Facebook Launches New Apology Plus App
In the wake of the latest privacy scandal, Facebook has announced a new version of its genuine remorse called Apology Plus.
Fast Food Industry Concerned About High White House Turnover
McDonald’s employees across the country are voicing their concern over “worrying” levels of turnover at the White House.
Britain To Seek Post-Brexit Trade Deal With Wakanda
Trade Secretary Liam Fox has said Britain is eager to leave the EU Customs Union in order to trade freely with the nation of Wakanda post Brexit.
Donald Trump Appoints Bob-omb as Secretary of State
United States President Donald Trump has fired Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, replacing him with a Bob-omb.
Evangelical Conservatives Insist Marriage Is Between Man, Woman And Porn Star
The nation’s leading evangelicals have moved to remind people marriage is between a man, his third wife woman and porn star.
Theresa May Threatens “A Stern Telling Off” Over Poisoning Of Russian Spy
Theresa May has warned Russia faces a “very stern telling off” if they are found to have any involvement in the poisoning of a former Russian spy.